Self-care is not selfish. To an extent, I have to disagree.
As women, and especially in today's society, I believe that we have glamourized and romanticized our right to take care of ourselves to the point that it has turned inward, so that we are no longer taking care of ourselves, but indulging in our desires. We have a spa day and call it self-care. We eat a dessert and call it self-care. We read self-help books and call it self-care. Now I'd be lying if I said I haven't splurged on a massage before, but the key question I have to ask myself and be HONEST with myself is this: What part of myself did I just take care of? Did that truly renew my spirit and breathe life into me, or was I simply looking for bliss from escaping my reality which will soon where off? Self-care becomes selfish when we take our eyes off the Most High one who can only every TRULY take care of us. So, I decided to live each day with a perspective shift of what my self-care looks like. This gets dirty, and uncomfortable, and honestly sometimes doesn't even feel like "care", at least not according to the world. But, you soon realize there is a release and freedom from anxiety, despair, and discontentment that only comes from doing the hard, Kingdom driven, Word of God kind of self-care.
"God didn't knit you
together so that you could
ask the world how
to take care of yourself."
Self-care should not have to be an escape from your everyday life.
God had greater plans in mind for you than to create a day to day that becomes so unbearable and dissatisfying, that you long to get away. This longing is different from the breath of fresh air from the overworked woman, or the overstimulated mom, or the emotionally burdened college student. This longing is born of discontentment. So, how then do we create an everyday that we don't need to escape from? We live in a life of grounded in peace and contentment. How do we attain this peace and contentment? Jesus Christ and the holy spirit moving within us. God didn't knit you together in your mother's womb so that you could ask the world how to take care of yourself? We are called to be in the world, not of the world. So why are we not turning to the one who knows us better than we know ourselves to REALLY take care of us? Not superficially, but spiritually. It really is that simple. He shifts our perspectives from worldly to eternal.
When this shift took place, I realized that the worldly ideas of self-care weren't what I needed. A mimosa and a pedicure might be nice in for the 45 minutes I'm out of the house, but what happens when it's time to go home? Rather, I decided to take care of my heart and, and rejuvenate a soul that was worn and tired. Reading my bible, being in the Word and waiting still, so still and quiet, for that small voice. Trading in the early glass of wine and Real Housewives episode during nap time for a cup of coffee and a quick workout. Doing the uncomfortable work of opening the bank accounts, planning the budget, and facing the reality of financial circumstances so that I am not consumed by anxiety and fear later because I want to treat problems like a child and wish them away. These are the things that my flesh did NOT desire, but my soul did. This is where I found escape, not from my life, but from my anxiety. I found a release from fear of the future. I experienced a contentment that pulled the scales from my eyes to see the joy I had been missing in what I considered the mundane. Self-care was no longer about indulging myself, but about refueling myself with the bread of life given to me by the ultimate care-taker.
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